We have a domestic help who has been with us for more than 14 years. When she came to work for us, my son was about 10 years old. How time flies. One of the reasons she came to Singapore was to send money home to rebuild her family home.
From what I gather, her family owns a farm and her mother runs a provision shop in their village. Her father passed away quite some time ago. She returns on home leave every two years and I understand that there is a big party where all her neighbours are invited for a feast. The preparation for the feast begins 2 years in advance. I am told that her mother would buy a piglet during her home leave so that it would be fattened sufficiently for the feast on her next return! Talk about planning. I don't envy the pig :p
Over the years, she has become an indespensible part of our lives. The household chores are taken care of and we are blessed that she is a wonderful worker - conscientious and caring. Each time she goes on home leave, we scramble with the housework - sweeping and mopping the floor, washing the bathrooms, washing the clothes, cooking, ironing, etc. I have tremendous respect for housewives who do this day in day out, year in year out without complain. I find some chores therapeutic, but the routine and daily grind is a challenge for me.
I am not complaining, but I wonder what kept her working here all this time. After she rebuilt the family home, she supported her younger brother through college. I found out later that her younger brother is the same age as my son. I did not know it earlier but later found out that her brother studied to be a Civil Engineer, like my son. Her brother got married about 2 years ago.
Some time in 2011, her brother made a trip to Singapore to visit her. At the same time, he came to look for a job in Singapore. He found one and I understand that he is an engineer with a Civil Engineering firm. What a brave move.
I am reminded of our forefathers who came to Singapore to seek a better life. Many of them left families in China to make a living here. They suceeded and we are the product of their adventure :) Are we better than our forefathers? Perhaps in education but not in worldly experience. It takes alot to decide to leave one's homeland to seek a better life. I am a little ashamed that I have become so comfortable and have lost the spirit to venture out. I am reminded of a documentary I watched on television about rehabilating Orang Utans. In a certain asian country, the wild life trade is quite rampant and poachers shoot adult Orang Utans with babies so that they can sell the babies in the black market as pets. Often, these pets are kept in cages and before long, they lose their ability to climb trees or pick up the life skills from their mother. A baby Orang Utan spends about 7 to 8 years with the mother before he/she is independent. These rescued Orang Utans need to be rehabilated before they can be released back into the wild. I cannot help but wonder if we are in a state of constant rehabilitation :P There is sometimes a tendency to depend on the establishment to solve our problems - high COEs, high cost of housing, high cost of medical care, etc...hmm....didn't they create these in the first place :P
Coming back to the point, it is about a better life. I just found out that our domestic help's sister in law is also seeking a job here as an Accountant. As I reflect on this, I am amazed that a humble foreign domestic help who has toiled in Singapore for 14 years has enabled her siblings and relatives a better life - in Singapore and in her home land. I salute her sacrifice and dedication to the cause. I am sure her story is not unique. Each foreign worker in Singapore probably strives to do the same, and as a result, we are richer because we have gotten to know them as a person and not a mere statistic.
3 comments:
We used to be pretty much a people who would adjust for social good. But that has changed.
When you create an apathetic lot of people who strive only for creature comforts and a "me-first mentality", I guess you can expect a spoonfeeding mentality. You think it might be easier to manage them but what you've done is to create a "monster". Pretty much like an education system that spoonfeeds students towards good grades alone. Then don't expect critical thinkers. It will take untold generations to undo this. IF, there is moral courage. But I say a mistake is never mistake unless you don't learn from them and correct them.
As for citizens, residents, permanent residents, or those on work passes, we are all mere statistics. To the powers that be. To civil services. To marketers. To the man on the street...etc etc... That's the reality. There are not many who become less than a faceless individual. But to those who do, than yes, our lives are the richer for it.
Sadly though, not everyone strives towards the betterment of the society they live in, the people they work for. They take and leave. Unlike our valiant forefathers who came, stayed, toiled and built.
Well said. Thankfully our forefathers were no subject to foreign worker quotas :p
It was a different time.
I think somewhere down the road to "monster[hood]" :p mindsets changed. This may be over simplifying things but there is general truth in it. Improving situations in life became about chasing the 5Cs. Respect slowly became equated to status and what you owned. Not the mettle of the person. So people shunned certain jobs. Pecuniary incentives overrided pride of work. But the reality is that with progress came a higher cost of living. So I'm not sure if I would be the first to point a finger when people shun jobs that offer salaries that hardly make ends meet. I don't know about you but balancing a household (extended household of 8) budget with S$1,000 a month is tough, during my growing up years! Let alone having a roof over one's head at that income. Kudos to mum. But back to the present, it might be easier for those who have dorms provided. :p I hear you. ;p
I guess you and I stand at opposite ends of this divide. You have jobs but no people. Where I stand, there are people and no jobs. So how? I think it doesn't matter what colour shirts or collars we wear. The issue has come to a head such that all solutions proferred should be evaluated for merit. This is the time to put aside pride and take what works and discard what doesn't. There is no one group with the only right solution. But we should also stop the tired, old blame game.
I don't know. I'm not the smart one who looks at problems. I see the problems and all I know is one size doesn't fit all anymore. Unless it's one of those deconstructed garments. I think we need to deconstruct to reconstruct. :p We need to balance what we see and hear (not what we look at or listen to) as not everything can be customised but not everything should be generalised.
Ok I'll stop thinking now or my comments will be longer than your blog entries. :D :D Besides, it might be time for me to find a job that pays me $750 an hour! ];) hahaha.... Better qualify... honest work, mind. ;) You know of any?
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